It’s been confirmed that the XFL (the Xtreme Football League) is coming back in 2020. While we can debate about whether this is a good idea or not (it’s not), let’s look on the bright side: Minnesota could potentially have another sports franchise on its hands! An XTREME sports franchise. While the possibility of Minnesota getting an XFL team seems fairly remote, as it didn’t have one back in 2001, it can’t hurt to dream!

So let’s go ahead and come up with the most XTREME names for Minnesota’s future XFL team. Maybe one that’s even based in Rochester!

The Minnesota Passive-Aggression

Credit: Jordan

This is easily my favorite choice. Our linebackers won’t just make bone-crushing tackles against the opposing team. Not in this league! They’ll also compliment them on their “interesting” play-calling and how their quarterback “didn’t make a throw that our quarterback would make, but it's important to try!” During the coin toss, our team captains will start by asking, “Oh, you’re wearing that?”

The Minnesota Loonatix

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This would compliment the Memphis Maniax quite nicely. This is the XTREME version of our state bird, who may or may not have had too much Surly to drink.

The Med City Malpractice

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Fresh out of the Olmsted County Adult Detention Center, the Med City Malpractice will decimate the opposing team's defense with surgical precision. Their star wide receiver will get tackled so hard, he'll wake up the next morning with a scalpel that was accidentally left inside him. I hear our quarterback was drafted from Corn Cob Tower University.

The Minnesota Lakeers

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An original choice for the name of a major sports team, the Minnesota Lakeers will play inside Super Bowl Stadium just outside of the Twin Cities. Personally, I'm Lovin' It, so they should Just Do It.

The Edina Cake Eaters

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I mean, if The Mighty Ducks really is coming back as a TV series, we might as well cash in.