I never get too caught up in the laws of the world, but after finding out it's illegal for me to pee in my neighbor's mouth... boy was I curious.

You would think written laws would be pretty serious, like you can't own an illegal firearm or violate an order of protection.  Well, in this case I'm going to open up a whole new world to you. Ready?

#1 - Illegal to give a dog whiskey or a lighted cigar

Okay, this is ridiculous.  I'm literally cackling.  How many people had to Google search "Is it okay to give my dog whiskey and a lighted cigar" for Illinois to make this a law?

attachment-Untitled design (3)
loading...

#2 - It's illegal to eat in a burning building in Chicago

WHO CAME UP WITH THIS??? It blows my mind that anybody would even consider sitting inside of a building that's up in flames.  I mean, it's definitely a one up from a normal date if you're trying to spice it up a bit.

Canva
Canva
loading...

#3 - In Decatur, IL you cannot drive a car without a steering wheel

Again, WHAT? You're telling me anywhere else I can take my steering wheel off and it's completely legal? Hmm... tempting.

Canva
Canva
loading...

#4 - In Kenilworth, IL roosters are required to stand 300 feet from a house if it wants to let out a crow.

I can't even train my cats to sit, how the heck does someone get their rooster to stand exactly 300 feet from their house?!  I'd like to see this for myself.  If anybody has a rooster they've trained for this law, please invite me over.

Canva
Canva
loading...

#5 - You cannot fish while sitting on a giraffes neck in Chicago

Normally, I'd sit in a boat but sometimes I just have that urge to bring my pet giraffe with me.  Anybody else feel this way?

Canva
Canva
loading...

#6 - It's illegal to make faces at dogs

Wait... I'm not allowed to smile at an adorable puppy??  What if they make a face at me first? This is madness, I'll go to jail any day of the week for this. BYE.

attachment-Untitled design (9)
loading...

#7 - In Peoria, IL you can't install a basketball hoop in your driveway

Well, my parents have a basketball hoop and I stopped using it after like the age of 11, so I guess it's just for show after a while.  I sorta get it!

attachment-Untitled design (10)
loading...

#8 - In Moline, IL there is no unnecessary repetitive driving on 23rd Avenue.

... What's happening on 23rd Avenue that people are driving repetitively?

attachment-Untitled design (11)
loading...

#9 - Bees are prohibited from flying over or through any of Kirkland’s streets.

What a buzzkill.  I'm imagining someone's full time job is just bee watching, that'd 'bee' kinda sweet.

Canva
Canva
loading...

AND TO TOP IT OFF.... *DRUM ROLL* ....

#10 - In Champaign, IL you can't pee in your neighbor's mouth

I dodged a bullet there, thankfully I live in Rockford so it's totally legal.  Sucks if you cleared your schedule this weekend to do this in Champaign.

Canva
Canva
loading...

Seven Incredibly Funny People From Illinois

The 25 Most Dangerous Towns in Illinois

According to statistics from the FBI, these are the 25 most dangerous towns in Illinois