These Illinois Bugs Just Want To Get Inside Your House This Fall

My daughter Molly, who may actually be the state of Illinois' most passionate bug-hater, recently told me that she likes the colder months here in Illinois for one big reason:

"There aren't any bugs around during cold weather, dad!" she said to me as if there couldn't possibly be any reason other than that to prefer Illinois' cold weather to warmer temperatures.

I tried to explain that there still are bugs around Illinois in both fall and winter, but by them she had tuned me out and was just focusing on the joys of having a few bug-free months as we head towards the end of the year.

I hope she doesn't read this.

It's Fall, And The Bugs Want Inside

Okay, maybe the bugs don't actually walk into your kitchen with a suitcase as the photo might suggest, but my "How To Add Hyperbolic Photos To Your Internet Posts" handbook said that the shot would work.

I wish I had saved the video from the time my wife actually set up a video camera to record herself in a battle to the death with a centipede on our basement wall. I was out of town, and she wanted video proof to back up her claims of a legendary throw-down with the bloodthirsty creature.

A picture of a woman doing battle with a giant fly in her kitchen is as close as I can get to recreating my wife's life-or-death centipede struggle, but as she tells it, it was kind of like this:

As I Said, It's Fall, And All Sorts Of Creepy-Crawlies Are Looking For A Warm Place To Spend The Winter

As cold as it gets here in the Rockford area, no self-respecting bug wants to get caught outside between late this month and March. So, they're looking to go rent-free for a few months at your place. Some of them will go completely unnoticed in your home, while others have a tendency to make themselves known.

Here Are The Five Or So Bugs Who Want In Your Northern Illinois Home

Brown Marmorated Stink Bugs. They're harmless, but you'll be sorry if you squish them.

Asian Lady Beetles (also known as Ladybugs). They're great when they're outside being beneficial to us by eating aphids and other pests. Inside, in groups, they can let off a very bad odor, and stain things when you smash them.

Western Conifer Seed Bugs. These guys are pretty much exactly like a stinkbug, except they can bite. Luckily, they're really slow-moving and are no match for your vacuum.

Boxelder (or, Box Elder) Bugs. They're pretty cool for a bug. They don't bite, they don't chew on your stuff. They're in your house for the warmth and shelter. They will stain walls if you smash them, so go with the vacuum.

Millipedes, Centipedes, and Sowbugs. They're great when they're outside doing what they're supposed to do (consuming decaying organic matter), but inside is a different story. They're harmless, but they do seem to provoke a primal reaction in many people.